How many times

How many times am I going to start a blog post that I never finish? How many times? I will spend quite a lot of time and energy into writing a post. Just the beginning, and then a wave of fuck that comes over me. I highlight all and erase or just trash the post. No drafts, just trash. Trash, trash, trash. I’ve come close to doing that a few times now but I’m trying this whole write or die thing. As in I keep writing because if I stop I will surely die. Therefore I have to be thinking of what I’m going to write ahead of what I have already written. It is getting close to that point now. I don’t know much else to say before reaching the point of saying what I’m thinking as I’m saying it. No longer is it planned ahead. Well perhaps I can take a few moments to.. NO! How dare I try to trick myself. Word of advice folks, don’t forget to take your medication. This is what day 3 now? Stop fucking up, dude? Oh yeah back to the other tangent of idiocy. So I don’t know where that all came from. My subconscious I suppose. Well how sub can it be if it now exists in print? It’s sublished. God that was a fucking horrendous pun. This was a good spot for at least a knuckle crack. Does anyone know if that is good to do? Or harmful I should say? This is a good exercise, for my fingers as well as my mind. No meds and all play makes Jake a dull blogger. Seriously should take those before I go to sleep. At least.

How many times will I miss my meds? No more times. How many times will you read these words? As many times as you please! I hope to find a niche within my own stadium of thoughts and focus this blog a little better. I’d like to get better as a writer and content creator. Since those are sort of different things now these days. I guess. Write or die, write or die. My wrists are beginning to cramp and I need to go take my meds. Take your drugs, kiddos. This little baby post has been brought to you bipolar.

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